Triggers can be powerful and overwhelming, causing intense emotional responses that may catch us off guard. Whether it’s a particular situation, a specific word, or a past memory, triggers can stir up a range of emotions, from anger and fear to sadness and anxiety. In this article, we will delve into the scientific aspects of triggers, with a particular focus on emotional triggers. We will explore how the brain responds to triggers and provide effective coping strategies to navigate these challenging moments. Trust me, I’m coming from all the way down there. As a highly emotional and reactive person, “how to deal with your triggers” was a pretty big thing in my life. All I’m sharing here comes from first my personal experience as a human being, and later my professional experience as a therapist. Let’s dive into it!
The Brain’s Response to Triggers: Unveiling the Science
To understand emotional triggers, we must first understand how the brain processes and responds to them. Scientific research has shed light on this fascinating aspect of human psychology. In an article titled “What Happens in the Brain When We Feel Fear” from Smithsonian Magazine, the intricate workings of the brain in response to triggers are explored.
When a trigger is encountered, the amygdala, a small almond-shaped structure deep within the brain, plays a crucial role. The amygdala acts as an emotional alarm system, rapidly assessing incoming stimuli for potential threats. It triggers the release of stress hormones, such as cortisol and adrenaline, preparing the body for fight, flight, or freeze responses.
Simultaneously, the prefrontal cortex, responsible for logical reasoning and decision-making, may temporarily lose some of its influence. This can lead to impulsive or irrational reactions, as the emotional brain takes the reins. The combination of heightened emotions and decreased cognitive control can make it challenging to navigate trigger-induced situations effectively.
How to deal with your triggers: Different kinds of triggers
Triggers can come in various forms and can differ from person to person. Understanding the different kinds of triggers can help us navigate them more effectively. Understanding those four common types of triggers, learning how to deal with your triggers becomes a lot easier.
- External Triggers: These are stimuli in our environment that can evoke an emotional response. Examples include specific sounds, sights, smells, or even certain places or objects. For instance, someone who experienced a traumatic event in a crowded area may be triggered by being in a similar environment.
- Internal Triggers: These triggers arise from within ourselves and are often associated with our thoughts, memories, or bodily sensations. Internal triggers can include negative self-talk, distressing memories, or even physical sensations like tightness in the chest or a racing heart. These triggers can be connected to past experiences, fears, or insecurities.
- Situational Triggers: These triggers are related to specific situations or contexts. Certain social settings, interactions with certain individuals, or challenging circumstances can act as situational triggers. For example, someone who has had negative experiences with public speaking may be triggered by the thought of giving a presentation.
- Emotional Triggers: These triggers are linked to specific emotions or emotional states. Emotions such as anger, fear, sadness, or shame can trigger us in different ways. For instance, criticism or rejection may be particularly triggering for someone who struggles with self-esteem issues.
Coping Strategies: Navigating the Emotional Turmoil
When faced with emotional triggers, it’s crucial to have coping strategies in place to help navigate the intense emotions and regain a sense of control. With those five effective strategies, you can navigate through your triggers a lot more easy and move on faster. The trigger itself is not the problem, the problem is us looping about it after. Spending any additional headspace on the bothering thing that happened hours ago is not progressive, it won’t bring you any further. Ultimately, your goal is to know yourself so well that you can tell when triggers arise and take measures to deal with them before it turns into an emotional outbreak. Looking at the long go, they should become less and less intense. But let’s start at the beginning:
1. Define your trigger points and situations
To effectively manage emotional triggers, it is crucial to define them with clarity and understanding. By recognizing the specific circumstances, people, or words that consistently elicit intense emotions within you, you can develop a proactive approach to handling them. Here’s a detailed strategy to help you define your trigger points:
Begin by creating a calm and quiet space for self-reflection and introspection. Set aside dedicated time to explore your past experiences, relationships, and emotional patterns. Allow yourself to delve deep into your thoughts and feelings.
During this self-reflection process, ask yourself probing questions to gain insights into your triggers. What situations make you feel uncomfortable or anxious? Are there certain topics or conversations that consistently evoke a strong emotional response? Reflect on the moments when you have felt particularly triggered and try to identify the underlying reasons for those reactions.
Journaling can be a powerful tool in defining your trigger points. Keep a journal specifically dedicated to exploring your triggers. Write about experiences or interactions that have caused you to react strongly in the past. Describe the emotions you felt, the thoughts that arose, and any physical sensations that accompanied those moments. Journaling allows you to create a record of your triggers, helping you identify patterns and commonalities among them.
In addition to personal reflection, seeking feedback from trusted friends, family members, or even a therapist can provide valuable insights. Share your observations with them and ask for their observations as well. Others may offer a different perspective or provide feedback that helps validate or challenge your own self-reflections.
Incorporate mindfulness practice into your daily routine to develop a heightened sense of self-awareness. During mindfulness sessions, pay close attention to the thoughts, emotions, and bodily sensations that arise. Notice if certain triggers consistently emerge during these moments of introspection. By developing a non-judgmental awareness of your inner experiences, you can more easily identify and define your trigger points.
Take note of patterns as you gain awareness of your triggers. Notice if certain triggers are more prevalent in specific situations, relationships, or contexts. Are there any recurring themes or underlying beliefs associated with your triggers? Understanding these patterns can provide valuable insights into the nature of your triggers and guide you in formulating effective coping strategies.
Remember that defining trigger points is a personal and ongoing process. Be patient with yourself as you explore and uncover your triggers. Approach this process with self-compassion and curiosity, allowing yourself the space to grow and evolve. By understanding your triggers, you can take proactive steps to manage them and cultivate healthier, more fulfilling relationships.
2. Apply health communication and express your feeling
Effective communication is crucial when dealing with emotional triggers. Have you every tried to simply express: ” I’m being triggered right now” and see what that does to the other person? In 90% of the time, they meet you with understanding and compassion. By expressing your thoughts and feelings in a clear and respectful manner, you can foster understanding and promote healthier interactions.
Practice active listening, giving your full attention to the person speaking without interrupting or formulating a response in your mind. Show genuine interest through maintaining eye contact, nodding, and using verbal cues like “uh-huh” or “I see.” Reflect back on what the person has said to ensure you understand their perspective accurately before responding.
There is a certain magic in “I” statements. When sharing your thoughts or feelings, use “I” statements instead of “you” statements. For example, instead of saying, “You never listen to me,” say, “I feel unheard when I share my thoughts and ideas.” This approach avoids blaming the other person and fosters open dialogue by expressing your own experiences and emotions.
Validate, empathize and acknowledge the other person’s feelings and validate their experiences. You want to be seen and heard, and so do they. Starting to put out what you want to receive often reflects exactly that back to you. Show empathy by trying to understand their perspective and demonstrating genuine care for their emotions. Use phrases like “I can understand why you would feel that way” or “It makes sense that you’re upset about this.”
If you don’t express needs and boundaries, how is the other person supposed to do this any different in the future? Clearly articulate your needs, boundaries, and expectations in any relationship. Doesn’t matter whether it’s friends, partners, lovers or family. Be assertive but respectful when communicating your desires and setting limits. Practice being direct and specific about what you want, while remaining open to finding compromises that meet both your needs and the needs of the other person. Always ask yourself: Are you compromising or are sacrificing? A compromise is a part of any healthy relationship, a sacrifice not.
3. Take some space and remember how to deal with your triggers
Recognize the value of taking space when triggered. In moments of intense emotional reactions, it’s crucial to step back and create some distance to not hurt the other person in affect. Communication is important, but there are times when you need to prioritize your own well-being and give yourself the space to process your thoughts and emotions without distractions or external pressures.
When you feel triggered, communicate your need for time alone to those involved in the situation. Let them know that you require some space to gather your thoughts and regulate your emotions. Simply say, “I’m being triggered, and I’ll be taking some space. Let’s talk later.” This can be especially helpful when engaging in heated discussions or when conflicts arise. Taking space doesn’t mean avoiding the issue or shutting others out; it’s about creating a healthy boundary to protect your emotional well-being.
Find a quiet and comfortable space where you can be alone with your thoughts. Remember the first two points of how to deal with your triggers, and apply them. Engage in self-reflection and introspection, allowing yourself to explore the underlying causes of your triggers. Journaling can be a valuable tool during this time, as it allows you to express your thoughts and emotions freely. Write down what you’re feeling, why it triggered you, and any patterns or recurring themes you notice.
Taking space provides an opportunity to practice self-care and engage in activities that help you relax and recharge. This can include practices such as meditation, deep breathing exercises, engaging in hobbies you enjoy, or simply taking a walk in nature. These activities help shift your focus away from the triggering situation and allow you to reconnect with yourself.
During this time, it’s important to gain perspective on the triggering event or situation. Ask yourself questions like, “What are my expectations and fears in this situation?” or “How can I approach this with more understanding and compassion?” Taking space allows you to step back from the immediate emotional intensity and gain a broader perspective to teach you how to deal with your triggers.
When you feel more centered and grounded, you can re-engage with the triggering situation or conversation from a place of calmness and clarity. Taking space empowers you to respond rather than react, fostering healthier communication and problem-solving. It also allows you to honor your emotions and needs while maintaining a sense of self-respect and boundaries.
Remember, taking space is not about avoiding conflict or disconnecting from others permanently. It’s about prioritizing your well-being and creating the necessary conditions for healthy and productive communication. By giving yourself the space to process and reflect, you can return to the situation with a clearer mind, greater emotional regulation, and an increased capacity for understanding and empathy.
4. Use the breath
Breathing practice is, as discussed in depth before, your ultimate tool to deal with your emotions. With one simple breath in the present moment, you break the chain reaction of triggers. The extra oxygen and the tiny pause between action and reaction activate the thalamus and cerebral cortex, the center for reflection and neutral assessment. You react from a conscious, not a subconscious state of mind. This is your quick fix for trigger situations, but I definitely recommend you a more long-term strategy for how to deal with your triggers.
When faced with emotional triggers, take a moment to pause and focus on your breath. Close your eyes if it helps you center your attention inward. Slowly inhale through your nose, allowing your belly to rise, and then exhale through your mouth, releasing any tension or negativity. As you breathe, visualize inhaling calmness and exhaling any emotional turmoil. Really tap into your belly breath, activating the dormant part of your nervous system responsible for rest and digest, getting you out of your fight and flight stress reaction.
Anybody can harness the power of conscious breathing as a practical coping strategy for managing emotional triggers. Our breath is intricately connected to our emotional state, and by deliberately regulating our breath, we can influence our physiological and psychological responses.
Engaging in regular breathing exercises helps activate the body’s relaxation response, reducing stress and promoting a sense of calmness. One effective technique is diaphragmatic breathing, also known as belly breathing. This involves taking slow, deep breaths, allowing the diaphragm to fully expand as you inhale and contract as you exhale. This type of breathing stimulates the vagus nerve, which helps regulate the body’s stress response and promotes a sense of relaxation.
Another technique is box breathing, where you inhale for a count of four and slowly work your way to an exhalation for a count of eight. Start with exhaling for four, and increase the count on the exhalation with every cycle. Your exhalation is directly connected to your parasympathetic nervous system and will calm you down immediately. This rhythmic pattern helps synchronize your breath and induces a state of calmness.
Regular practice of breathing exercises strengthens your ability to respond rather than react to triggers. By consciously regulating your breath, you create a space of mindfulness and self-awareness. This allows you to observe your triggers without being consumed by them and choose a more intentional and balanced response.
Incorporate breathing exercises into your daily routine, dedicating a few minutes each day to focus on your breath. You can do them in the morning to start your day on a calm note, during moments of stress or emotional upheaval, or as a part of a bedtime routine to promote relaxation and restful sleep. By making conscious breathing a habit, you develop a powerful tool for managing emotional triggers. It becomes an anchor of stability and self-care in challenging moments, helping you find inner balance and cultivate a greater sense of emotional well-being. Also, it leads straight to our next tool because the breath is the best way to ground you into any meditation.
5. Meditation – how to deal with your triggers long term
As we discussed in depth already, meditation is your shortcut to happiness and with that, dealing with your emotions. Embrace the transformative power of meditation as a long-term coping strategy for dealing with emotional triggers. Meditation is a practice that involves focusing the mind and achieving a state of calm and clarity. It provides a range of benefits, including increased self-awareness, improved emotional regulation, and enhanced overall well-being. Also, it will teach you how to deal with your triggers in the most gentle, unexpected but powerful way.
Engaging in regular meditation allows you to cultivate a greater sense of mindfulness, which is the ability to observe your thoughts, emotions, and sensations without judgment. This heightened awareness enables you to recognize your triggers as they arise and develop a more conscious and intentional response to them.
During meditation, you can utilize specific techniques to address emotional triggers directly. One effective approach is to practice loving-kindness meditation, where you cultivate feelings of compassion and goodwill towards yourself and others. This practice helps soften the impact of triggers by fostering empathy, understanding, and forgiveness.
Additionally, mindfulness meditation can help you observe and accept your emotions without getting entangled in their intensity. By becoming an observer of your thoughts and emotions, you create a space of detachment that allows you to respond to triggers with greater clarity and calmness.
Regular meditation also has physiological effects on the brain and body. It activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for the relaxation response. This helps reduce stress, anxiety, and reactivity to triggers. Furthermore, meditation has been shown to increase the production of “happy hormones” such as serotonin and endorphins, which contribute to a sense of well-being and happiness.
Incorporating meditation into your daily routine doesn’t require a significant time commitment. Even a few minutes of practice each day can yield noticeable benefits over time. Find a quiet and comfortable space, sit in a relaxed posture, and focus your attention on your breath, a specific mantra, or a guided meditation. Consistency is key when it comes to how to deal with your triggers, so aim to make meditation a regular part of your self-care routine.
By integrating meditation into your life, you cultivate a deeper connection with yourself, strengthen your resilience, and develop a greater capacity to navigate emotional triggers with grace and equanimity. It becomes a powerful tool for self-growth, promoting inner peace, and contributing to your overall happiness and well-being. As a starting point, just try out what works for you. If you get serious about it, and once you experience it’s power, you will, come to a retreat to get in-depth knowledge about this age-old science.
Let me know your experience with coping in the comments!
